Chapter Eighteen

Things had changed in Raizada mansion. Once filled with teasing and moaning, was now filled with moping and quietness. Arnav wouldn't touch Khushi and Khushi quite preferred it that way. Having her heart broken, she really wouldn't be able to stand it if he had touched her.

They all sat quietly at the table for dinner, Arnav at the head of the table, Khushi sitting beside him, and Dhruv at the other end of the table as always. The wedded couple ate quietly while the younger Raizada merely observed. He had noticed this new distance that had been created between the two and it was wedging them apart. Originally he had a plan to use Khushi's old playmates to do something, but seeing that the two had done it themselves, he didn't need them... for now.

With dinner complete, Arnav and Khushi got up to go their own way. Khushi watched as Arnav left to his study and her shoulders sagged.

He won't even look at me.

It hurt Khushi even more that he would ignore her - more than the fact that he didn't love her. Khushi made her way to leave, when she heard Dhruv tsking. She stood under the entryway of the dining room and Dhruv joined her, standing on the other side and leaning against it.

 

"Trouble in paradise, I see," he smirked.

 

Khushi rolled her eyes and went to leave.

 

"It's such a shame, really," Khushi heard him say, and she paused.

 

"The way you look at him and the way he ignored you... too bad," he fake-sympathized.

Khushi's head whipped around and she glared at him. Dhruv simply smirked at her and feeling annoyed by just his presence, Khushi stomped away.

 

Annoying little fucker!

 

*~*

As usual, Arnav was at the office, Dhruv was getting drunk somewhere, and Khushi was at home. Even though there were many workers wandering through the mansion and a guard standing here and there, Khushi felt extremely lonely. Khushi didn't really feel like doing much, so for the majority of the day, she read in bed and took a nap.

I love you.

Khushi woke up with a start, her eye springing open.

Arnav?

She sat up and looked around the room, but there was no one there. The room was dark but the beady red light from the alarm clock told her it was past 8.

He's not home yet?

Khushi was now curious. Arnav should have been home a couple of hours ago, yet he wasn't. Yet her heart told her that he was, and that he was at one point, in this room. But it made no sense to Khushi, so she ignored it and decided to see for herself if Arnav had returned. So she quickly washed up and headed downstairs, finding no one, not even a guard.

What in the world?

Meghla came walking into the room, drying her hand over her little apron. "Ah, you're awake! I didn't know if you didn't want to be disturbed, so I didn't wake you."

Khushi smiled at the woman lightly. Although she had no idea of how a mother should be, Meghla was a mother figure to her. "Where are all of the guards?"

"Arnav had them all leave. He just came home and dismissed them for the night. Everyone actually, except for me."

Her eyebrow automatically arched. He dismissed everyone?

"I don't know why, but he did," she said, as if she had heard Khushi's thought.

Khushi nodded, dismissing her.

Why would Arnav just send them all away? Is something wrong? But where is he?

Deciding to get to the bottom of this, Khushi went to look for him. She went to his study, but Arnav wasn't there. She checked the billiard's room too, but Arnav wasn't there either.

Great, where do I find him in a huge house such as this?

Khushi thought of looking from room to room, any room she thought he might be in. She checked several bedrooms, even the room that was hers for one night, but he was nowhere to be found. She continued her search, when she arrived to a room with the door locked. Khushi turned and shook the doorknob several time, but to no avail did the door open. For some reason, Khushi felt a strange vibe, and she looked at the door oddly.

What's behind this door?

Giving the knob one last rattle, Khushi walked away, glancing back at the door one last time. She made her way downstairs and glanced from left to right. 

Which way should I go now?

Deciding to go right, Khushi searched through the house. Something in her heart told her that Arnav was around, so she was positive she was going the right way. Suddenly the sound of a piano filled the air, catching Khushi's ears. The tune sounded quite familiar but Khushi was curious as to where it was coming from. She followed the tune down the hall and arrived to the ballroom. It had been a while since Khushi had come in here, not feeling much of her artistic mood to dance nor sing. 

In the far corner of the room sat a grand piano. Khushi had never seen it be used, thinking of it to be used as just a piece to decorate the room. But now seeing it used and hearing it's keys in the air, Khushi knew it was more. 

Especially seeing Arnav sitting behind it, singing. 

His eyes were shut as his fingers moved on their own, as if he had it all memorized. Khushi was marveled not only by that, but by his beautiful voice. 

What would I do without your smart mouth?

Drawing me in, and you kicking me out

You've got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down

What's going on in that beautiful mind

I'm on your magical mystery ride

And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright

Wow... he sounds amazing. The way he carries out those notes... beautiful. 

Khushi found her feet silently carrying her towards Arnav. She looked at him with a daze, mesmerized by this man who clearly had many talents - a business man who was the mightiest in their land, is also talented at the piano and has a magnificent voice, as well as an expert lover. 

Lover?

My head's under water

But I'm breathing fine

You're crazy and I'm out of my mind

'Cause all of me

Loves all of you

Love your curves and all your edges

All your perfect imperfections

Give your all to me

I'll give my all to you

You're my end and my beginning

Even when I lose I'm winning

'Cause I give you all of me

And you give me all of you, oh oh

Khushi leaned beside one of the large windows and crossed her arms. Hearing his voice relaxed her, so she shut her eyes and listened, drowning out everything else around her. 

'Cause I give you all of me

And you give me all of you, oh oh

Khushi's eyes drifted open. She watched him for a moment, Arnav's eyes still shut as he lost himself to the music. 

He seems as if he's singing with all of his passion, his soul... his heart. 

Khushi thought about it for a moment. 

Could this be why he sent everyone away? So that no one would end up hearing him sing? But Meghla- then again she's been here a long time, she's like a maternal figure to him. 

She observed him as words poured out of his mouth in their lovely tune. 

But of all songs to sing, why this one? Is it supposed to mean something? Or am I just thinking way too into it? 

But her heart told her otherwise, that she wasn't thinking too into it. Her mind told it that it was crazy, but her heart could care less. Feeling sanity ready to lose itself, Khushi silenced the two and moved behind Arnav. She simply stood there, listening to him end the song. Several moments passed, when Arnav's voice filled the room once more. 

"How long have you been here," he asked softly. 

"Long enough," she replied, her tone matching his. 

Arnav simply hummed lightly in acknowledgement. Not once did he turn to her and Khushi merely observed him. His fingers hovered over the keys, now and then his fingertips slightly brushing along them. Khushi could feel an energy coming off of him, as if he were battling himself. It bothered her, especially after seeing how at peace he was just moments ago. So she moved towards him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Khushi looked down at his bowed head; she didn't know what to say nor if she should say something. 

Seconds passed, when Arnav finally sighed and picked his head back up and leaned it against Khushi. His eyes were shut and Khushi remained silent. 

"This is probably the most couple-thing we have ever done," Arnav sighed, his eyes remaining shut. 

Khushi hummed in response, smiling lightly at the thought of it. Arnav didn't say anything else and curiosity began to get the better of Khushi. 

"Arnav... of all songs to sing... why did you choose this one?"

"Because I like it."

"Oh."

Khushi looked away to the side. The slight bit of hope she had within her, hard as she didn't want to feel it, had been crumbled. 

Arnav placed his hands over Khushi's arms, causing her to look back at him. He didn't say a word and simply sighed, his eyes still closed. 

"Arnav?"

"Hmm."

"Did you send everyone home so that they wouldn't hear you sing?"

"Hmm."

"Oh."

Khushi pursed her lips. As per usual, she never got any answers properly. Disappointed, she tried to pull back, but Arnav's grip tightened. 

"Oh no you don't," he said softly. 

Khushi looked at him with surprise. 

"I haven't touched you in ages. Now that I've got you, I'm not letting you go."

Khushi felt her heart thud and she gulped. 

"So you're staying right here missy."

Khushi couldn't help her small smile. His playful nature was making its appearance and she quite loved it. 

I love you.

Khushi gasped inwardly. "Arnav?"

"Hmm."

"Um... did you come up to our room? While I was asleep, that is."

Arnav opened his eyes and looked at her. "You're asking quite a number of questions, aren't ya!"

Khushi frowned; his sarcastic nature was back. But Arnav ignored her and shut his eyes again. 

"What's behind the locked door," she asked. 

Arnav's eyes reopened immediately. He was giving her the eyes, but Khushi ignored it. 

"When I was looking for you, I came across the room. What's behind it?"

He gave her a little more of the eyes before closing them again. This irritated Khushi - a lot.

"Oh, so you won't tell me," Khushi scowled. "Looks like I'll have to wait for Dhruv to pick this lock before I find out about the truth again."

Arnav opened his eyes and glared at her but Khushi could care less. She tried to pry her arms free, but Arnav's grip was too tight. 

"Let me go."

"I highly doubt it."

His grip tightened, but he made sure that he wasn't hurting her. 

"Let me go Arnav."

Arnav stood up, keeping his hold on her arms. He freed himself for a moment and turned to face her, while Khushi continued to glare at him.  

"No," he finally said. 

Khushi let out a heavy sigh, exhaling hard. Arnav stepped towards her and Khushi stepped back in surprise, her eyes widening slightly. 

"Became a tad sassy, have you."

It wasn't a question, but Khushi answered anyways. "No."

"Oh, I'd beg to differ."

Arnav stepped forward and Khushi stepped back. Her eyes never left his as he approached her and she tried to move away. 

Wait, why am I backing away-?!

Khushi's back met the wall, causing her to gasp. Arnav moved in front of her, leaving her very little space, has arm entrapping her along with his body. Khushi began to feel overwhelmed by her emotions. A part of her was awakening from its slumber, her libido to be more precise. It stretched and purred, and slowly became aware of their situation. Another part of her was glaring at Arnav with her arms crossed, tapping her foot profusely. Her heart was simply gazing at him in adoration. 

All in all, Khushi was confused. 

"It has been a moment," Arnav muttered softly. 

Khushi tilted her head in confusion. There was just something about the way he had said it that poked her. But she had to agree - it had been quite some time since they had been close, since they had been really close. And with each passing second, Khushi felt her desires increasing. 

But he doesn't love me, her brain cried. 

Then we'll make him love me, her heart argued. 

Before Khushi could even realize what she was doing, she took a fistful of Arnav's shirt and pulled him down to her, smacking her lips onto his with a moan. Arnav was shocked by her actions, but only for a second before his own brain kicked into gear, as well as his heart. 

Khushi trailed her arms up and wrapped them around his neck, urging him closer to her, standing on her tiptoes. To make it easier for her, Arnav picked her up and Khushi's legs automatically wrapped around him. Releasing her lips, Arnav trailed to her neck and Khushi turned her head away, giving him more access. 

"You're mine now," she heard him growl. 

Before Khushi could open her mouth, Arnav pulled them away from the wall and headed out of the room. He took them upstairs to their room, all the while kissing her, and placed her down on their bed. Khushi's fingers fumbled with the buttons of Arnav's shirt and once all of them had been released, Arnav pulled back. 

"You're not going anywhere tonight wifey," he announced, removing his shirt. 

"I don't want to," Khushi breathed, her chest rising and falling. 

Arnav smirked, tossing his shirt aside. He picked Khushi up so that she was sitting up. Khushi looked up at him as he reached down for her nightgown. She lifted herself slightly so he could pull it up from beneath her and held her arms up to let him remove it. Once he tossed it aside, Khushi placed her hands on his chiseled chest. They wandered across, tracing it. 

"You're beautiful," she said softly. 

Arnav arched his eyebrow. "Beautiful?"

Khushi could hear the teasing in his voice but she ignored it. "Beautiful... handsome...." She looked up at him. "Lovely."

"Lovely?"

Khushi nodded. "Lovely."

Arnav simply looked at her. He looked deep into her eyes and could see the love she felt for him. It was as clear as daylight how this woman felt for him. In that moment, he wanted to share with Khushi that he felt the same way for her as well. However, given the past, Arnav simply could not voice it. 

No, that you can't Raizada... but you can show her. 

Without another thought, Arnav cupped Khushi's cheek into his hand and kissed her softly. Khushi found this to be slightly strange but she said nothing and instead got lost into his kiss. She once again felt the sheets against her back and after that was a blissful blur. It was nothing like anything Khushi had ever experienced before. What they had done was different - soft, slow... loving. 

Khushi looked up at Arnav, resting her chin on his chest. Arnav's eyes were shut as he focused on steadying his breath. 

Do it Khushi. Just do it!

"Arnav?"

Arnav opened his eyes and gazed down at her. "Hmm?"

Khushi pursed her lips and glanced down at his chest. "Um... well... I... I... well, um... well-"

Khushi looked up at him and was shocked to see him waiting patiently. Knowing him, she expected him to interrupt her the second she began stumbling. Yet there he laid. Quiet and waiting. 

Why?

Because he loves you, her heart chanted. 

Khushi's brain was stunned. /What nonsense!

No, not nonsense - fact. You can see it in his face. 

Khushi blinked. Only now did she realize that there was something different about Arnav. He wasn't his usual self at all! He was still waiting for her to say what she had to say... which was actually quite strange, coming from Arnav Singh Raizada. 

See? Told you he loves you, her heart smirked. 

Oh my- does be really? Could he really...?

Khushi pushed herself up and moved over Arnav, straddling him. Her eyes stayed on him as she tried to figure him out and hoped that her heart wasn't wrong. 

"You're staring wife."

Khushi pursed her lips. He hadn't said it rudely, but she was still confused. 

"What do you have to say wifey," he asked, his hands moving to her waist. 

Khushi sighed at his touch and placed her hands over his. Whether he loves me or not, I should tell him. At least he'll know how I feel and my chest will feel lighter. 

"Arnav I... I... well I... I-"

Arnav sat up, bringing his face close to hers. Khushi's eyes slightly widened as she looked at him and as he gazed at her. 

"Khushi, I know what you're trying to say," he said softly. 

Khushi's eyebrows automatically met in the middle. "Really?"

Arnav arched his eyebrow. "What did I say about questioning me," he frowned. 

Khushi ignore him. "You know?"

"Yes Khushi, I do," he replied, surprising Khushi when his voice wasn't filled with irritation. 

"Oh.... And...?"

Arnav looked at her for a moment. Khushi didn't remove her eyes off of him, waiting anxiously for him to say something. Then he finally broke their contact and looked down, his thumbs tracing small circles on her flesh. 

"I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell you those words, Khushi."

Khushi's lips parted as pain began to ebb in her heart and tears threatened to form. He really doesn't love me. 

"Don't get me wrong, it's just that... I mean the feelings mutual..."

Khushi's eyebrows shot up. 

"...I just probably won't be able to say it."

Now Khushi was confused. 

"You have to understand by now wifey that I'm not exactly the most emotional person. I don't know how to exactly connect the words to them." He looked up at her. "But what what can tell you is that the feeling is mutual."

"So... you love me," see asked, hope very much evident in her voice. 

Arnav nodded. Tears began to form in Khushi's eyes as happiness filled her heart. A smile spread across her face and she cupped Arnav's face in her hands and kissed him with all of her love. 

"I love you," she whispered. 

"Likewise," he smiled softly. 

Khushi couldn't help her grin. Arnav may have not been able to say the words she wanted to hear but it was okay - what was most important was that he felt it.